Working Mama (Again)

SO here it goes...
(crying tears as I write this)

These past 8 months have been filled with SO much joy, laughter, memories and even sometimes tears! (Good and bad). I feel SO beyond blessed that I was able to spend this time with Olivia, raising her, being with her and close to her! If you have been following this blog for a while you may remember this post where I shared that I would be leaving my full-time position to be at home with Olivia. Well, as of today I will be working Full-time again.

While I am sad to return to work I am also VERY excited! I didn't have plans to return to working full-time but I had an opportunity that I just COULDN'T turn down and this is going to be AMAZING for not only myself but benefit my family in SO many ways!

Being at home with Olivia really has been SUCH a blessing but Jeremy and I know that she needs to be around other kids.  We do not have may programs in our area to be able to take her to. There are no "mommy and me," "gymboree," or "toddler time" classes and because of the obvious reasons that we don't belong to a church or a synagogue we don't have those playgroups to be able to attend either...

We will be sending Olivia to a daycare that is more like a preschool where she can learn, grow and play with other kids her age. We took Olivia for a tour and she didn't want to leave. She just soaked it all in and was SO excited and happy. We loved the teachers and program and Olivia fit RIGHT in with the other kids! She was SO in her element and that, to me, proved to me we are making the right decision. I am SO excited for Olivia to make new friends, be invited to birthday parties and bring home "school" projects for us to hang up around the house!

I do have the sad moments too, though. These next couple weeks I KNOW are going to be SO SO tough! I know I am going to REALLY, REALLY miss her! LUCKILY, daycare will just be part-time to start off with. Jeremy will be able to be with her in the morning and we will all be able to spend my lunch break together and then he will take her to day care in the afternoons. ( Being able to have lunch together and NOT be the drop off parent makes this a LITTLE easier!) Also, my new job is practically in walking distance, so I will still be VERY close to her and home! (Also, we go on our family vacation in 2 weeks so I have THAT too look forward to as well!)  I always treasured our time together, but now our evenings and weekends will be even more special together!

When I quit my position back in March, I never would have thought I would return to working full-time again. I have seriously cherished these past 8 months with my girl! I was there for SO many milestones and moments I would have missed if I would not have quit my previous position. I am SO grateful to Jeremy for allowing me to take this time to be selfish (my words, NEVER, EVER his!) and be at home. There are certain times of the day I will miss more then others, but any second I am with my little family I am whole.

I wouldn't be lying if I didn't say how excited I am to have all of this extra income coming into our household! I do not feel we have gone without anything , but it will be nice if there are nights I do not feel like cooking, that I won't have to feel guilty about grabbing some take out! The timing couldn't be better with 2 vacations coming up and the holidays! I know it will be a tough adjustment period, but I know in the end that this is SUCH an amazing opportunity! (Not only for our bank account but my career as well!) I am also excited to get dressed up everyday, possibly add some clothes to my wardrobe and make new friends! I love my time with Olivia but the adult time will be great since most of my girlfriends do not live close.

Since this is my second time returning back to work, I already kind of know what to expect. This time obviously is much different, Olivia was almost 5 months (2.5 months corrected) last time I returned to work and now this time is 18 months. When Olivia was a NB she knew who I was but was basically, eating, sleeping and pooping. Now this time, when I leave the room just to pee, Olivia gets upset. She KNOWS when I am not around, which makes this hard. I think, and hope, that Olivia adjusts well to this change.

So, in the past couple weeks if my instagram and tweets seemed a little emo and sketchy, now you know why! I didn't want to jump the gun and make any announcements until I was 100% sure on my decision!

Wish me luck, I know today will be a tough day, but I am really excited at the same time!!

(This pic was taken when I returned to work October 2011, this was once I got home.  I had missed Olivia's cuddles!!)