I have changed

(This post was inspired by the bridal shower I attended on sunday)

Before becoming a mom, and a wife, I didn't have many responsibilities. I went to school, worked and paid a few bills. 

I also liked to go out, A LOT! I loved bar hopping with my girlfriends, going to house parties, and just lived pretty carefree. If I felt like spending my money on going out to eat or a dress I would wear 1-2 times, I did. I did because I could. 

I still have friends in my life who live this way. To them, there life is great, and they say they wouldn't trade it or change it. 

I am not here to judge them. If they are happy, then I am happy for them.

but

that is not the life I saw for myself. I've always dreamt or being a wife and mom. 

Once I graduated college, I had been engaged for 6 months, was planning for our wedding, saving up for a house and paying LOTS of bills. (well lots back THEN! ha) 

Once I was married, Jeremy and I started talking about having a baby and started saving for all the expenses that came with that responsibility.

Then came Olivia. Nothing else mattered. No one else mattered.

The only thing I wanted to do was spend time with her. The only things I wanted to buy had to do with her. Life changed. For the better.

I lost some friends. I gained some friends. 

Some people are not meant to become parents. Some people say they don't want to become parents. Some people who aren't parents say things they shouldn't say to people who are parents.

When I was at the bridal shower on sunday, all I head people say under there breath and actually to my face was how they would never want kids. How kids ruin your life. They ruin your marriage. etc. etc.

It made me SO mad! Here I am sitting with Olivia, who I brought not intentionally to piss people off. I couldn't BELIEVE how rude people were being! A lot of guests told me they couldn't believe how well behaved she was! Yes, there were a couple times she decided to become what we call the "human zoo" and show off the animal noises she knows during the most silent moments. BUT she acted the best she could. I was so proud of her. SO proud to be her mom and I had a GREAT time with her!

To the women who INTENTIONALLY were rude to my child and I, I hope you feel good. I hope it made you feel better to say rude things. I hope you felt better giving us the evil eye and saying how horrible it would be to become a mother.  I hope your life doesn't change. 

I also hope you never get to experience how wonderful it is to become a mother. I hope you never get to experience hearing the joy that comes from a true belly laugh. I hope you never get to experience that first snuggle from a freshly bathed baby. I hope you never get to look deep into a babies eyes and feel your world just stop because you know life doesn't get any better than this moment.

My point to my rambling is that not everyone experiences life the same. People go through life stages at different times and ages. You never know what someone else is going through, but no matter what, especially as women. We should lift each other up and not tear each other down. We shouldn't judge each other. We should be happy for each other. I may not love to spend my weekends getting so drunk that I am hung over for days, but that doesn't mean that I can't be friends with someone who does. I didn't like being judged for enjoying being a mother. I didn't know that the shower didn't include children. The invitation didn't say adults only. If I would have known I would not have brought Olivia. BUT I also would have been bored with out her. When I looked around the room, 75% of the guests were playing on their phones checking our FB and IG updates!

Maybe instead of no children, the invite should have said no phones! 

okay, <end rant>